
Leather Bears all over the U.S. and in foreign countries like Alabama are preparing for all out war with the evil flesh eating bears that have in recent weeks began to pour out of woods and used car lots in the billions bent on tasting sweet human flesh.
Harry G. Lorryhole, vice chairman of LeatherBear Nation stated that "these god damned monsters are giving us a bad name, they must be destroyed!"
He has admonished all LB Nation members to start pumping even more iron than usual.
The director of the Centers for Bear Disease Control in West Branch Iowa thinks this is a good plan. "We know that the only way to kill wild bears is to punch them repeatedly in the left ear, bullets or laser beams, hell, even nuclear weapons just bounce off them like salmon eggs."
The Congress has recently set aside one hundred ninety seven trillion dollars to pay for leather harnessess and weight sets as the world waits to see if the coming bearpocalypse can be stopped.

No comments:
Post a Comment